OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
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