Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
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