i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
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