i think my tv is drunk
if i can run in heels then i can drive
Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
Need sex. Gaining weight.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
i just realized that the oil change sticker on my windshield is a day before the last time i had sex. I've driven exactly 10500 miles since.
you need to get laid.. and an oil change.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
