There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Randomize
