And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
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