Already got asked if we're dating
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
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I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
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