i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize
