i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
