I'm having a debate with **** over whether or not he is gay... what's your verdict?
GAY or at the very least bisexual.
His "joking around" with all of his roommates is clearly as act. He needs to step back and reevaluate his sexual orientation.
Weird... you've rode him.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
Rumble strips road head = magical
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
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