Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
