Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Randomize
