Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Sorry about my life...
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
