I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
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