I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
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