Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
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Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
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