wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
Randomize