check it out our google latitudes are spooning
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Randomize
