If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
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