He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
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