I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
Woke up in an unfamiliar basement in a sleeping bag with Matt to a police officer shining his flashlight in my eyes and asking me my birth date and social security number. My morning went swimmingly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
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