Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Randomize
