i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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