yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
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