Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
