We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
You are the jesus of drinking
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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