I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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