I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Randomize
