Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
Randomize
