and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
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