A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
Randomize
