Soap is not a condiment
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
