no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
