I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
