i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Randomize
