no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
I could fuck to npr.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
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