my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Randomize
