you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Randomize
