i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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