I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
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