I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
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