I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
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