I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
