great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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