I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
