Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
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