I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
I made him laugh his dick is mine
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
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