ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
I'm just crazy horny about you
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
