one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
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