Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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