I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize