when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Randomize
