Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize
